I thought I would join a link up this month and as I was scrolling down the many blogs a post jumped out at me. Laurel Regan of Alphabet Salad's Gratitude List. It's always a good thing to keep positive and what better way than to reflect on everything that you are grateful for?

Rainy Days in Waterstones, Oxford

We all have plenty to be grateful for but I think in today's society that is extremely easy to forget between jobs, job interviews, money, social networking and fast, well everything. I know that I forget regularly but stopping to think about the good things in your life, even if it's just for ten minutes, is a worthwhile exercise in positive thinking. So without further ado, here is my gratitude list. This month I am grateful for :

• Tea. For the days when you feel like giving up and a friend takes you aside, makes you some tea and your troubles melt away. For the times when Tesco deliver 7 boxed of green tea to you for free because your mum must be their favourite customer.
• Meals out. On evenings where you are simply tidying and plan to do nothing other than finish tidying and watch Netflix but you receive unexpected phone calls inviting you to dinner.
• Netflix. See what I did there? When all you want to die is hide in bed an eat copious amounts of ice cream Netflix will always have your favourite tv shows to keep you company.
• Cats. You know those cats in the street that you meet for all of five seconds? They are my favourite cats. You look at one another, form a five second bond and then you both leave to carry out your lives. Those cats really describe the nature of a cat's independence.
• Art. I love making art, the people that make art and the people who love the people that make art. As a Libra I love feeling like I am part of something beautiful and what could be more beautiful than art? When you find it please tell me.
• The Unexpected. Some people fear the unexpected, I thrive in it. I love never knowing what could happen. Unexpected trips, friendships, relationships. Whatever is meant to happen usually does.
  
• Keepsakes. All of those bus/train tickets, midnight drawings and letters that you hide in a box under your bed. I love being able to look at my memories all over again.
• Common Ground. I am grateful for all the times I have been talking to someone and they have understood with perfect clarity exactly what I was talking about. Even if it was a silly discussion about a film, I didn't forget it.
• New Music. Not necessarily music that has just come out but music that is new to me really makes a difference. As much as I love listening to the same song on repeat for three days it can be really great to mix up my playlists once in a while and give something different a chance.

Every now and then the things I am doing and want to do seem to get a little blurry. Almost like I am reaching for something far away but it is just too far to see. This is something I have been thinking about a lot recently and I figure that I can't be the only one who occasionally feels this way. So I decided to write a blog post about what helps me when my goals seem a bit fuzzy and out of focus.

1. Take a break
   Stop thinking about how confused you are and just let yourself be. You are probably losing focus because you are analysing you goals too much which makes you question them. This is okay, it will help keep you on the right path but it is also important to remember that you are living in the present not the future. So take a deep breath and let it be.
2. Drink some tea
   Whenever I am stressed out or feeling a little lost my boyfriend advises me to drink some tea and while it is probably quite English of me to say it often helps. I am quite fussy when it comes to regular tea, however I frequently drink fruity, floral and herbal teas. Often they also come with added benefits such as Chamomile for calming.
3. Talk to someone
   I find it really helps me when I don't know if I am aiming for the right things to discuss that with someone that would want the best for me. I also like to talk to more than one person to gain perspective. So usually I will ask for the opinions of my mother, step father and boyfriend as I know that they are all very different but they all want me to be happy.
4. Go for a walk
   Personally when I go for a walk, if I don't stop whilst walking I come back even more stressed out than before but this doesn't mean going for a walk doesn't help me. All it means is that when I go for a walk the best thing for me to do is find somewhere in nature to just sit and think (or not think) and be. I know a lot of us forget to stop sometimes, there is always something to do. Even when it appears I have stopped and I'm chilling, in bed whilst watching netflix often I haven't stopped because my mind is still active. Going for a walk and a sit really slows that down.
5. Write a list
   I love writing lists and I know I've said it before but I will probably say it again at some point. Write a bucket list. Write a list about what you want to have and where you want to be in five years. Write a list about things that make your uneasy. Write a list about how to deal with the things in the previous lists. I find that lists really help get everything out in a more organised way than just splattering your thoughts on to paper (which is also good). 

Sometimes it can all get a bit too much. You end up feeling, sad, stressed, tired and overall just not your best but that's alright. Although not every tip in this post will work for everyone I decided to write this in the hope that maybe a couple of them may help a little when you aren't feeling your best.

• Have a relaxing bath, add some bubbles and close your eyes for a while.
• Write down a prioritised list of things you need to do to make you jobs a bit more manageable.
• Watch an uplifting movie or some funny youtube videos.
• Call someone who makes you smile.
• Take a few deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. This is best if you are sitting down.
• Draw, colour, write or paint. Anything creative could really help to get your feelings out.
• Take a walk, the fresh air could do you good, especially if you live somewhere with good scenery.
• If you are at work, let your boss know you need to toilet and give yourself a minute to breathe and get some water. You are much more helpful to them calm anyway.
• If you feel really bad, give yourself a mental health day. Just don't make it a habit!
• If you have college work to do and it is piling up. Look at each project one at a time. It is better to hand in one finished project than five barely started ones.
• Make yourself your favourite meal.
• Do something nice for someone else. The good deed might actually make you feel better.
• Create a little box filled with your favourite snacks, DVD, video game, items etc and use it when you need it.
• When you are happy write little notes to yourself to read later on.
• If you have a pet seek their company. 
• Exercise if you're feeling up to it. It releases endorphins that make you happy.
• If you're a bit like me just grab some chocolate, it basically does the same thing. Not quite as healthy though.
• For every negative thought you have force yourself to think of three positive ones.
• Talk to a friend you haven't seen in a while. When you catch up you'll be more inclined to want to tell them about the positive things in your life.
• If you need it sleep. There is nothing wrong with sleeping, just try not to sleep all day every day.
• Force yourself to go out. You might actually have a good time!
• Get all dressed up. Even if you aren't going anywhere. It often makes you feel better about yourself.
• If you had plans and you aren't feeling up to it, it's okay to cancel. Just try to reschedule a time when you think you might feel better.
• Remember that you aren't alone. There is always someone willing to listen. Whether it is a family member, friend, partner, counsellor or helpline. Someone is always there for you.

Confidential mental health information 9am until 5pm Monday to Friday.
Phone: 0300 123 3393
Email: info@mind.org
Web: www.mind.org.uk/help/advice_lines

Photo taken by Owen Newton

I am one of those people who tries to do things even when I am afraid of them. Which is probably fortunate because I'm afraid of a lot of things. My boyfriend and I went to Oxford on Sunday to do a bit of shopping and he decided he wanted to climb a hill which was part of a castle near the town centre. As you have probably guessed I am extremely scared of heights so this wasn't something I particularly wanted to do.

However, I figured I may as well give it a go. Grasping onto my boyfriend's hand I slowly climbed the hill. (Wearing heels was probably not my best idea). Eventually I reached the top. At the time it seemed really high up and I'll be honest with you I panicked a little but looking back I'm really glad I did it. I didn't fall off and looking at the pictures my boyfriend took it was really beautiful. I'm hoping that if I keep doing the things that make me nervous then I'll stop waiting until they're over to appreciate them. I want to live in the now.

Photo taken by Owen Newton

I am hoping this post may remind you to face your fears. As I am learning that if it is worth doing, it is probably a bit scary to begin with. It's okay to be afraid but it is important that you do your best to confront your fears. Even if you only make it halfway up the hill, or half a step. One foot forward is better than no feet at all. So take a deep breath, take it one step at a time and go as far as you can. We can do as much or as little as we want. Make the choice to go farther. It doesn't matter how fast you get there or where you want to be. Just be brave and don't give up. You'll reach the top of your hill.

And hopefully, I'll reach the top of mine too.